Texts From Last Night

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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1

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  (610): He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1 http://tfl.nu/y50i
  Replies (17) Good night (6658) Bad night (1643)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina

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  (808): guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina http://tfl.nu/joff
  Replies (17) Good night (785) Bad night (4566)
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  (650): View more from California

  This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"

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  (650): This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case" http://tfl.nu/fgo6
  Replies (12) Good night (6570) Bad night (876)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.

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  (512): I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high. http://tfl.nu/3kr7
  Replies (27) Good night (5359) Bad night (1057)
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  (863): View more from Florida

  I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila

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  (863): I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila http://tfl.nu/e6je
  Replies (20) Good night (945) Bad night (5734)
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  (707): View more from California

  Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.

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  (707): Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb. http://tfl.nu/i5x2
  Replies (8) Good night (1815) Bad night (820)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.

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  (401): just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point. http://tfl.nu/mbzv
  Replies (10) Good night (2098) Bad night (904)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.

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  (215): i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo. http://tfl.nu/xre9
  Replies (8) Good night (1464) Bad night (528)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.

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  (562): When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid. http://tfl.nu/iodi
  Replies (5) Good night (1317) Bad night (703)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.

  (810): View more from Michigan

  Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible

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  (248): Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online. (810): Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible http://tfl.nu/lrjw
  Replies (1) Good night (991) Bad night (461)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."

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  (541): Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub." http://tfl.nu/xtt2
  Replies (15) Good night (1878) Bad night (765)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole

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  (617): Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole http://tfl.nu/3dil
  Replies (7) Good night (2491) Bad night (349)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs

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  (805): It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs http://tfl.nu/6q0t
  Replies (3) Good night (546) Bad night (209)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm

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  (630): the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm http://tfl.nu/tyw9
  Replies (3) Good night (658) Bad night (577)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch

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  (913): It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch http://tfl.nu/1u6j
  Replies (0) Good night (368) Bad night (180)

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