I don't think brook has ever known best
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
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