i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
How naked do you want me to be?
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