We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
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