She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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