as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
