Me too!
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
