hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
wow bdsm is so cute
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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