Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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