Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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