Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
we made out on top of his cat.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
me + whiskey = a bad person
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
