3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I need to sanitize my soul.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
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