i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize