Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
