I look better un-naked...
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Randomize
