Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
