Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
