first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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