Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
