He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize