i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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