ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
