this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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