when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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