Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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