Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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