Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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