why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize