Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
