The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
