Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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