Betty ford says i'm here all night
i can't believe i had my finger in that
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
