It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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