my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
