so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I will pee on everything he values.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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