Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
