I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
