i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
