But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
