Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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