Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
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