Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
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haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
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You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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