He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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