one two three fourrrrnication!
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
how drunk are you?
Several
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
