Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
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