I will die if light touches me.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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