Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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