I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Is Oprah even human
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
