Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
