i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize