Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Randomize
